Showing the working out…

This is mostly notes for my own nefarious, wedding-cake-making purposes, so I’m going to put most of it under a cut.  But if you enjoy reading the convoluted workings of my brain when trying to calculate food and allergy things, by all means, click here…

So, I need to make a wedding cupcake tower for approximately 45 people.  That’s 60 cakes, or 5 batches.  I’ve also been asked to make a snake cake, a lemon cake, and vegan truffles.  The theme generally is eternity, which reflects just how long I’ve spent going around in circles trying to figure out the catering.

Dietary requirements to watch out for: 5 nut allergies, two fructose and lactose intolerant (which incorporate two of the nut allergies), 1 vegan, and lots of vegetarians, not that this is really an issue in desserts so long as I lay off the gelatine.  Nobody is admitting to being gluten-free, dairy-free, or allergic to something else random in isolation from any of the rest, but there’s always one…

Snake Cake – good for the vegans, and any random dairy or egg-free types, not so much for the nut-free or fructose intolerant, what with all that pastry.

Lemon Cake – I think I’d better make this one dairy-free with coconut milk, and gluten-free with a nut-free glutenless flour mix.  At that point, it can be eaten by everyone except the vegans and any random egg-allergic people

Assorted Sweetmeats – are clearly going to be fine for the vegans.  The one and only vegan is totally winning this battle of the recipes.  I can’t see a way around the fructose in most of these, but I will have to see what related recipes I can find.  I can make the apricot ones nut-free, at least.  I am suddenly deeply tempted to make teeny tiny toffee apples by making macadamia, maple and dried apple truffles on sticks and dipping them in toffee.  This is almost certainly the way of madness, but that won’t necessarily stop me, because if that works, it would be a whole world of cute.

Wedding Cupcakes

Chocolate Chilli Cupcakes are good for one and all.  And if I pipe dairy-free chocolate ganache into their centres then everyone will want them!  And if I am truly insane, I could try candying chilli for a decoration, but I think that really is the way of madness.

The only question is whether to make one batch or two, really.

Fresh Ginger Cupcakes – may or may not be vegan, depending how they go.  These are the cupcakes that make me feel guilty, because I feel that, technically speaking, I should be trying to make them *something* free.  Well, I mean, they are nut-free, at least, but still.  If I am feeling elaborate, blood orange curd piped into their centres.  But they probably won’t need it, and if I don’t, they are at least dairy-free.  I do have dairy free curd recipes, but since they all have nuts in them, and I *do* have known nut allergies on the list, I think I’d best stick with the dairy variety.  Or none.  They don’t really need too much embellishment.

Hummingbird Cupcakes – for which I really ought to work out the final recipe, though at least I now have bananas going brown in anticipation.  These are going to have dairy AND gluten AND nuts AND eggs AND fructose.  So there.  They may even have cream cheese icing and nuts on top.

By my count, this means that anyone who is vegan, egg-allergic or dairy allergic will be fine with the chocolate-chilli cakes, all the sweetmeats and the snake cake.  And possibly the ginger cakes, depending what I decide to do with them.  Which is a pretty adequate selection.  Anyone who is nut-free should be fine with the chocolate or the ginger cupcakes, with the lemon cake and with the apricot and orange sweetmeats, so also good.  Fructose and lactose is the worst served at this point, with the lemon cake and the chocolate chilli cupcakes, and the faint possibility that something will occur to me, sweetmeat-wise.

I think, even for my neurotic self, this is probably adequate.  Though I’m still feeling a bit guilty about the lactose/fructose thing.  Now I just have to finalise decorations (making sure they don’t cross any allergy boundaries) and make the Shopping List of Evil…

Oh, and bake everything.  That part is important too.

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