Let’s start by admitting one thing about this smoothie: it isn’t green. Nor is it rainbow coloured. But it is still a Green Smoothie, because from everything I can see, any smoothie with green leafy stuff in it counts as green. And it definitely starts looking a bit more swampy after a few hours in the fridge, though that probably isn’t a selling point in most circumstances (it still tastes fine, honest). As for the Rainbow Smoothie side of things, I feel the ingredients speak for themselves:
See? Rainbow. True, blue is a tad under-represented, but I felt that adding Blue Curaçao to a breakfast smoothie might undermine its credibility in the healthy breakfast stakes. Though the flavour would be quite complementary, if you wanted to go with the Healthy Yet Hair Of The Dog option. Just saying. Not that I am advocating alcoholic breakfasts, unless they are pancakes, which are a different matter entirely.
Wow, this recipe went off the rails pretty fast, didn’t it?
Anyway. I have to admit, 9/10 of the inspiration for this recipe was the ‘hey, I can use lots of colours’ thing, and the other 1/10 was ‘hmm, better use up this kale before it leaves the fridge under its own steam’.
God, this is sounding worse and worse.
It’s actually a pretty nice smoothie, not that I expect you to believe me at this point. It’s fairly mild in flavour – I was a bit iffy about it at first sip, but liked it more and more the more I drank (and now you really will think I filled it full of Blue Curaçao and truly and honestly I did not, it’s just late on a Thursday night and I’m apparently insane), so the almond milk actually gets to be a bit of a feature rather than just the thing you use to thin out your smoothie, and the banana is a little more present than usual, too. I’d be inclined to add a pinch of cinnamon or nutmeg next time, in fact.
And no, I really wouldn’t add Blue Curaçao to this. (Rum would be a much better match for the almondy flavour…) (Stop it, Catherine!)
Your Shopping List1 small banana 5 smallish kale leaves 90 g blackberries or blueberries, frozen is good 110 g strawberries (you really can fiddle around with the berries a fair bit, though. This was just the contents of my fridge and freezer) 1/3 cup orange juice, to which you will not add vodka, because this is not that sort of breakfast, what are you thinking? You might also peel a medium-sized orange, remove most of the pith, and put it all in whole – I would have done this, if I had been able to find a ripe orange on my tree. 1 cup almond milk
Now what will you do with it?
Blend it. In a blender.
Oh, alright. How about you hull the strawberries, peel the banana, and strip the kale off its stem (and discard the stem), and *then* put it all in the blender except for the almond milk. You can then add the almond milk bit by bit and see how much you actually like.
It’s actually a surprisingly pretty colour.
Don’t eat it with cupcakes for breakfast. Because – I will not lie to you – while I did not, in fact, adulterate this smoothie with alcohol, I did drink it while eating two mini cupcakes from the Little Cupcake Bakery, and not only was this a terrible combination, flavour-wise, it also totally ruined the air of glowing good health and virtue that I was trying to project. Learn from my mistake! Eat the smoothie with oaty choc chip cookies instead!
(but not cheesecake)
(yes, I have that in my fridge, too)
(as well as chocolate lollipops, which I have *als0* learned do not make a healthy breakfast. I’m quite cluey, you know.)
I really would go the whole orange variation if possible, as well as adding the cinnamon and nutmeg next time. You can, of course, use any combination of fresh or frozen berries, but do use berries if you can, as they cover up the kale flavour nicely.
This smoothie is vegan, gluten-free and not too bad in glycemic index terms, but it is obviously not low in fructose, nor is it nut-free. If you can’t eat nuts, dairy milk would work, as might oat milk. You’d want one with a nice flavour, though, because it does shine through. I’ve heard one can make a milk out of sunflower seeds, but haven’t tried this. You might also make this with more orange juice instead of any milk at all. I suspect that coconut milk would be a bit cloying here, so I wouldn’t use it.
My evil side suspects that chocolate milk would be nice. Or you could add cocoa powder + a date, or better still, Ovaltine or Milo to your milk. Yum. But beware, because if you are anything like me, Ovaltine will make you BOUNCE OFF THE WALLS.
And no, I haven’t had any of that tonight, either. This is just natural exuberance. Or something.
(I’m going to have another choc chip cookie now. Because that is unquestionably a sensible thing to have for dinner when I’m already silly.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~One year ago: Nearly Raw Truffles of Two Kinds Two years ago: Recipe: Sfoof! (Turmeric and Semolina Cake)